The Cost of Doing the Right Thing

Francisco is a Marine veteran client that I work with. He had two tours in Iraq and struggles to deal with what happened. Francisco was in-voluntary extended after his 4 years in the corps because he was supposed to be a part of the “surge”. His last tour he had a fellow marine from his unit die in his arms on his first tour and now he had to go on another one. Francisco lives with the feeling that his fellow Marine took his last breath while he was holding him. Francisco continues to feel that last breath leaves the Marine before he died. That incident effects his decisions to this day. One of the reasons he made the decision to do what he thought was right the rest of his time in the Marines, and that decision cost him.

What he was concerned about the most is his inability to not make lance corporal. He separated from the Marines as a corporal. This is very demeaning to him, especially the reason why he did not make rank. You see, Francisco made the mistake of standing up for an inferior marine why he was beaten by his Sargent. His Sargent was beating a fellow Marine in the next rack while he was trying to sleep. Francisco continually tried to stop the Sargent from beating the Marine. He was told to stay out of it. After the sergeant was done beating the Marine he proceeded to treat the marine by doing CPR. The Marine was beaten so bad he had stopped breathing. He then filed a complaint and the sergeant was reprimanded. After that incident Francisco was always having to look over his back. He was ostracized as being a trouble maker and a rat. He was treated with little respect by his peers in the corps. After he had decided to leave the Marine Corps he was offered a promotion, which he refused. After being treated the way he was for saving his fellow Marine he decided he would get out. He feels he is being looked down upon by fellow veteran Marines for doing the right thing.

Francisco continues to struggle by questioning his choice to do what he felt was right. He has seen many that have done questionable things and have gotten away with them, and even becoming better off than they were. He feels doing what was right has cost him many times in his life and he consistently asks me why he should keep doing what was right because it has not helped him, it has only hurt him. It is a difficult task to convince someone that doing the right thing is what is best even if it cost them. He tried to do what the Marines told him to do, he followed the written code to the letter, and the problem was he did not follow the unwritten code of not telling on others when he sees hazing of another Marine.

Another issue that Francisco deals with is what other Marines say about him behind his back. He has told several people this story since he got out and they have looked down upon him as if he was still in. What Francisco needs to learn is he owns his story that he does not have to tell everyone about his situation. Francisco is an honest person who feels bad about holding back anything from his time in the Marines. He has lived his life being the honest person, he feels like it has backfired. Unfortunately, his case is not the only one I've heard. It is difficult to make these decisions and he made it. Francisco did the right thing but paid the price of doing it.

From a clinical standpoint it is difficult for young man to deal with this type of burden. In his mind the choice he made will affect him for the rest of his life. Many men and women in the military are brave enough to stand up for what they feel is right. There are those that stand up for what they believe is right knowing there will be consequences to their actions. Some accept that responsibility and move forward. Others struggle with their decision and consistently wonder if they made the right one. Many things the Marine struggles with when he gets out in society often does not do the right thing. Even though all military branches are taught integrity loyalty commitment not all people follow that code. Doing what's right can often lead to struggles. Many civilians do not make ethical decisions and that bothers those who do. Those who do the right thing start to question whether they're doing the right thing by sticking to their morals. This type of stuff happens and some pay the consequences. My opinion is we should all stand up for what is right even though it costs us. If everyone used this code the military, civilians, and society would all be a better place.

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

Moral Injury, Another Veteran Crisis

William is a Vietnam Veteran in failing health who I met through a veteran’s program. William is starting to look back at his life and starting to prepare himself for his death. Like many Vietnam veterans William is struggling with what he had to do in Vietnam. The unconventional battlefield that started in mass numbers during the Korean uses women and children to carry out some of their attacks, service members have no clue who their enemy is, you just have to follow orders, make judgement calls, and hope for the best.  

When William’s unit entered a village in Vietnam, they were ordered to destroy the village and kill or capture anyone who was there, this included women and children. Military intelligence had informed his commanding officer (CO) that the village was a haven for Viet-Cong and must be destroyed. They completed their mission and proceeded to follow orders to burn the village to the ground and kill all those who refused to surrender, even women and children. What was accepted by his superior’s and his chain of command as following orders is something William would live with the rest of his life. William is starting to look back at his life and wonders how he could go to heaven after killing so many people and breaking his moral code. Thanks to following orders William has spent most of his life self-medicating with drugs and alcohol trying to forget the pain he has had since he was 19 years old. William is not only suffering from PTSD, he is suffering from moral injury.

Moral injury is a relatively new term but the idea is as old as war. The term was first used in the late 1980’s and described as “the psychological burden of killing and the betrayal of leaders. The definition of moral injury is the damage done to one's conscience or moral compass when that person perpetrates, witnesses, or fails to prevent acts that transgress their own moral and ethical values or codes of conduct. Moral Injury is a slow burn that takes time to sink in. It requires a healthy brain that can understand moral reasoning, evaluate behavior, experience empathy, and create a coherent memory narrative. It is a negative self-judgment based on having transgressed core moral beliefs, values or feeling. Many time in war soldiers are placed in high stress situations and are told they must betray there since of “what’s right” to carry out orders given by someone who has the position of legitimate authority.

When we think of what military members go through we look for and expect to hear fear. But what is coming to light is sadness related to loss, but also attributed to bearing witness to evil and human suffering including death you participated in. There is fear in most who have seen combat, but what happens after fear. For some it takes minutes, for others it takes years to feel the sadness or sorrow of forgetting your human morality. Veterans try and suppress their moral injury and some succeed through the use of drugs and alcohol which brings on its own set of issues. Others work hard to support their families and place their morality on the back burner, they are doing what is moral, providing for their family and working. 

A common theme is veterans feel that nothing can prepare you for what war is really like. When they return home to some it feels like they have lost their soul. It not hard to believe when society states, thou shall not kill, military culture states thou better kill, be killed, or suffer the shame of not trying. In today’s wars veterans do not know who their enemies are. Many women and children, including babies have been killed by accident or necessity. Driving past wounded women and children and not stopping to help because of orders, making the decision to shoot civilians because you don’t know who your enemies are, killing families because of one enemy sympathizer, killing someone over anger because they killed or shot your comrade are all breaches of Americans moral code.

In war military members must follow orders without question, and at times those orders shake the soldier’s moral beliefs. There appears to be no end in the breach of moral codes in war. The symptoms of moral injury include shame, survivor guilt, depression, despair, addiction, distrust, anger, a need to make amends and the loss of a desire to live.

Some military leaders reject the idea of moral injury and one leader advised a suicidal soldier to “be an adult” and get over it. In the future, the loss of morality and moral injury is going to explain a big chunk of why veterans suffer as they get older. Some feel moral injury is one of the primary factors in military suicide rates. The key for friends and families is to be on the lookout for moral injury and get them the help they deserve.

Many soldiers who serve in combat reach out to counseling from Chaplains. The same mental health stigma is not attached to talking to the Chaplin as a mental health professional. Also speaking to a Chaplin will not go into their permanent records. They also believe that most therapist do not have knowledge of theological issues such as morality concerning good and evil, or religious meaning. Veterans also believe when they raise moral questions about conscience in therapy they get referred. There is nothing wrong with reaching out to both. There are also clinicians who have been trained in religion and are pastors who are licensed therapist.  

Moral injury is not something that can be cured by medication. The restructuring of their moral identify and meaning is the key. What it takes is the support of caring non-judgmental community who can find a way for veterans to forgive themselves. Our communities need to understand the war does not end when our troops return home, it is just the beginning, just ask the Vietnam Veterans who are still dealing with this issue 40 plus years later. There is hope, in the VA there is funding for a 4-year study on moral injury in Marines. Let’s see where that leads.  

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

[FOR OCTOBER] Marines & Families of Marines Take Note (Copy)

October is Cancer Awareness month, so I thought discussing an issue that not all Marines and their families know about was warranted. Contaminated water at Camp Lejeune North Carolina has been linked to multiple medical conditions including various kinds of cancer. I was talking to Josh about some of his health issues he had been fighting for years. I did not put Josh’s time in the Marines and his illness together until I ran across the contaminated water issue at Lejeune while doing research for another project I was working on. It appears Marines and their families stationed at Camp Lejeune during a 34-year period had been exposed to contaminated water. I found out that Josh was stationed at Lejeune for his entire 4 years in the Corps. I talked to him about what I had discovered and that this could be a part of his medical issues and that he should check it out.  

The years Marines and their family were exposed to the contaminated water at Camp Lejeune are from 1953 to 1987. As in the past with issues, it took 30 years for the Department of the Navy, Marines, and the VA to admit there was a major health problem concerning Marines and their families assigned to Lejeune. On January 13, 2017, congress gave the VA permission to issue a new rule creating a presumption that certain diseases are eligible for disability benefits. These benefit’s involves Active Duty, Reserve, and National Guard members who served at Camp Lejeune for a minimum of 30 days (cumulative) between August 1, 1953 and December 31, 1987 and their families. For Vietnam and Gulf War veterans, we know what its like to have a presumptive issue. It’s no fun fighting the VA so be prepared to deal with a long, drawn out bureaucracy.    

As we all know, families are not allowed to seek medical care at the VA. Families that served with their Marine at Camp Lejeune during the designated times need to be aware of the presumptive heath issues. By law, the VA can only compensate for eligible out-of-pocket expenses. After a family member has been diagnosed with a presumptive illness, other health plans have paid their part, the VA will pick up the out of pocket costs. It is important that the family members primary care physician know about Camp Lejeune and the possible illness linked to the time spent there. This includes the children who lived on the base during the timeframe. This rule is not the VA’s fault, its congress’. By law, only congress can approve the VA to see dependents even if the military is the cause of the illness.

Remember managing your expectations is imperative when dealing with the VA. It is not fair that the military placed you in the position you are in, but it is not the person’s fault who’s working with you either.  When dealing with a bureaucracy like the VA, you can easily get frustrated and give up. Even if you do not trust the VA or like them, it is imperative you get on the Camp Lejeune contaminated water registry, if not for your health but for your family’s health. If you or your family were stationed at Camp Lejeune anytime from 1953 to 1987, please act. The instructions tell you to enroll on-line, I would go to the VA in person and get on the registry to ensure you get documentation.      

VETERANS ENROLL IN VA HEALTH CARE

• Go to the VA. Have your DD-214. If you have documentation of your service at Lejeune take it also.

• Inform VA that you served on active duty at Camp Lejeune for at least 30 days anytime in the period of August 1, 1953 and December 31, 1987. If you are already enrolled contact your local VA health care facility at their website http://www.va.gov/ directory/guide/ to sign up for the Camp Lejeune Program and receive VA care.

• Not yet enrolled? Apply online at https://www.va.gov/health-care/apply/application/introduction or call toll-free at 1-877-222-8387.

FAMILY MEMBERS GATHER DOCUMENTS

• Show your relationship to a Veteran, such as a marriage license or birth certificate.

• The VA will assist you with verifying residency on Camp Lejeune during the covered timeframe. GATHER QUALIFYING EXPENSE RECEIPTS

• APPLY FOR REIMBURSEMENT

• Apply online at https://www.clfamilymembers.fsc.va.gov or call toll-free 1- 866-372-1144.

QUALIFYING HEALTH CONDITIONS INCLUDE:

• Bladder cancer

• Lung cancer                

• Hepatic steatosis                      

• Breast cancer               

• Multiple myeloma                   

• Miscarriage

• Esophageal cancer                   

• Myelodysplastic syndromes

• Neurobehavioral effects           

• Kidney cancer

• Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma      

• Renal toxicity

• Leukemia                                

• Female infertility

• Scleroderma

For questions or comments, we can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

The Cost of Doing the Right Thing

Francisco is a Marine veteran client that I work with. He had two tours in Iraq and struggles to deal with what happened. Francisco was in-voluntary extended after his 4 years in the corps because he was supposed to be a part of the “surge”. His last tour he had a fellow marine from his unit die in his arms on his first tour and now he had to go on another one. Francisco lives with the feeling that his fellow Marine took his last breath while he was holding him. Francisco continues to feel that last breath leaves the Marine before he died. That incident effects his decisions to this day. One of the reasons he made the decision to do what he thought was right the rest of his time in the Marines, and that decision cost him.

What he was concerned about the most is his inability to not make lance corporal. He separated from the Marines as a corporal. This is very demeaning to him, especially the reason why he did not make rank. You see, Francisco made the mistake of standing up for an inferior marine why he was beaten by his Sargent. His Sargent was beating a fellow Marine in the next rack while he was trying to sleep. Francisco continually tried to stop the Sargent from beating the Marine. He was told to stay out of it. After the sergeant was done beating the Marine he proceeded to treat the marine by doing CPR. The Marine was beaten so bad he had stopped breathing. He then filed a complaint and the sergeant was reprimanded. After that incident Francisco was always having to look over his back. He was ostracized as being a trouble maker and a rat. He was treated with little respect by his peers in the corps. After he had decided to leave the Marine Corps he was offered a promotion, which he refused. After being treated the way he was for saving his fellow Marine he decided he would get out. He feels he is being looked down upon by fellow veteran Marines for doing the right thing.

Francisco continues to struggle by questioning his choice to do what he felt was right. He has seen many that have done questionable things and have gotten away with them, and even becoming better off than they were. He feels doing what was right has cost him many times in his life and he consistently asks me why he should keep doing what was right because it has not helped him, it has only hurt him. It is a difficult task to convince someone that doing the right thing is what is best even if it cost them. He tried to do what the Marines told him to do, he followed the written code to the letter, and the problem was he did not follow the unwritten code of not telling on others when he sees hazing of another Marine.

Another issue that Francisco deals with is what other Marines say about him behind his back. He has told several people this story since he got out and they have looked down upon him as if he was still in. What Francisco needs to learn is he owns his story that he does not have to tell everyone about his situation. Francisco is an honest person who feels bad about holding back anything from his time in the Marines. He has lived his life being the honest person, he feels like it has backfired. Unfortunately, his case is not the only one I've heard. It is difficult to make these decisions and he made it. Francisco did the right thing but paid the price of doing it.

From a clinical standpoint it is difficult for young man to deal with this type of burden. In his mind the choice he made will affect him for the rest of his life. Many men and women in the military are brave enough to stand up for what they feel is right. There are those that stand up for what they believe is right knowing there will be consequences to their actions. Some accept that responsibility and move forward. Others struggle with their decision and consistently wonder if they made the right one. Many things the Marine struggles with when he gets out in society often does not do the right thing. Even though all military branches are taught integrity loyalty commitment not all people follow that code. Doing what's right can often lead to struggles. Many civilians do not make ethical decisions and that bothers those who do. Those who do the right thing start to question whether they're doing the right thing by sticking to their morals. This type of stuff happens and some pay the consequences. My opinion is we should all stand up for what is right even though it costs us. If everyone used this code the military, civilians, and society would all be a better place.

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

Moral Injury, Another Veteran Crisis

William is a Vietnam Veteran in failing health who I met through a veteran’s program. William is starting to look back at his life and starting to prepare himself for his death. Like many Vietnam veterans William is struggling with what he had to do in Vietnam. The unconventional battlefield that started in mass numbers during the Korean uses women and children to carry out some of their attacks, service members have no clue who their enemy is, you just have to follow orders, make judgement calls, and hope for the best.  

When William’s unit entered a village in Vietnam, they were ordered to destroy the village and kill or capture anyone who was there, this included women and children. Military intelligence had informed his commanding officer (CO) that the village was a haven for Viet-Cong and must be destroyed. They completed their mission and proceeded to follow orders to burn the village to the ground and kill all those who refused to surrender, even women and children. What was accepted by his superior’s and his chain of command as following orders is something William would live with the rest of his life. William is starting to look back at his life and wonders how he could go to heaven after killing so many people and breaking his moral code. Thanks to following orders William has spent most of his life self-medicating with drugs and alcohol trying to forget the pain he has had since he was 19 years old. William is not only suffering from PTSD, he is suffering from moral injury.

Moral injury is a relatively new term but the idea is as old as war. The term was first used in the late 1980’s and described as “the psychological burden of killing and the betrayal of leaders. The definition of moral injury is the damage done to one's conscience or moral compass when that person perpetrates, witnesses, or fails to prevent acts that transgress their own moral and ethical values or codes of conduct. Moral Injury is a slow burn that takes time to sink in. It requires a healthy brain that can understand moral reasoning, evaluate behavior, experience empathy, and create a coherent memory narrative. It is a negative self-judgment based on having transgressed core moral beliefs, values or feeling. Many time in war soldiers are placed in high stress situations and are told they must betray there since of “what’s right” to carry out orders given by someone who has the position of legitimate authority.

When we think of what military members go through we look for and expect to hear fear. But what is coming to light is sadness related to loss, but also attributed to bearing witness to evil and human suffering including death you participated in. There is fear in most who have seen combat, but what happens after fear. For some it takes minutes, for others it takes years to feel the sadness or sorrow of forgetting your human morality. Veterans try and suppress their moral injury and some succeed through the use of drugs and alcohol which brings on its own set of issues. Others work hard to support their families and place their morality on the back burner, they are doing what is moral, providing for their family and working. 

A common theme is veterans feel that nothing can prepare you for what war is really like. When they return home to some it feels like they have lost their soul. It not hard to believe when society states, thou shall not kill, military culture states thou better kill, be killed, or suffer the shame of not trying. In today’s wars veterans do not know who their enemies are. Many women and children, including babies have been killed by accident or necessity. Driving past wounded women and children and not stopping to help because of orders, making the decision to shoot civilians because you don’t know who your enemies are, killing families because of one enemy sympathizer, killing someone over anger because they killed or shot your comrade are all breaches of Americans moral code.

In war military members must follow orders without question, and at times those orders shake the soldier’s moral beliefs. There appears to be no end in the breach of moral codes in war. The symptoms of moral injury include shame, survivor guilt, depression, despair, addiction, distrust, anger, a need to make amends and the loss of a desire to live.

Some military leaders reject the idea of moral injury and one leader advised a suicidal soldier to “be an adult” and get over it. In the future, the loss of morality and moral injury is going to explain a big chunk of why veterans suffer as they get older. Some feel moral injury is one of the primary factors in military suicide rates. The key for friends and families is to be on the lookout for moral injury and get them the help they deserve.

Many soldiers who serve in combat reach out to counseling from Chaplains. The same mental health stigma is not attached to talking to the Chaplin as a mental health professional. Also speaking to a Chaplin will not go into their permanent records. They also believe that most therapist do not have knowledge of theological issues such as morality concerning good and evil, or religious meaning. Veterans also believe when they raise moral questions about conscience in therapy they get referred. There is nothing wrong with reaching out to both. There are also clinicians who have been trained in religion and are pastors who are licensed therapist.  

Moral injury is not something that can be cured by medication. The restructuring of their moral identify and meaning is the key. What it takes is the support of caring non-judgmental community who can find a way for veterans to forgive themselves. Our communities need to understand the war does not end when our troops return home, it is just the beginning, just ask the Vietnam Veterans who are still dealing with this issue 40 plus years later. There is hope, in the VA there is funding for a 4-year study on moral injury in Marines. Let’s see where that leads.  

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

Veterans Can Fall Victim to the Failed Mental Health System

I was talking to a client the other day and she brought up the shooting in Thousand Oaks CA. Jamie had trouble understanding why a person like the shooter was able to purchase a weapon. She did not understand that the shooting was a product of our failed mental health system. The shooter’s PTSD might have played a part in the shooting, but if the mental health system was not so difficult to navigate, the shooter might have been able to get help or be stopped.  The shooter could legally purchase a weapon because he had not been committed to a mental hospital. The shooter understood the mental health system and knew what to do and say when approached about his PTSD by family members and authorities. According to the newspaper, the shooter’s mother tried to get him help but he refused. The way the laws are written around mental health, there is nothing that can be done unless the right situation arises. It is tough to take away someone’s civil rights but in California, if the shooter had been committed to a mental hospital, he would not be able to possess a weapon for 5 years. Because the shooter was never committed to a mental health hospital, he was legally allowed to purchase the weapon.

The Thousand Oaks shooting puts a negative light on veterans again. The shooting is a reminder of our broken mental health system in the United States, not just the VA but the entire mental health system. Part of the problem with the broken mental health system is the rules are different throughout the country. Every State, County, or local Municipality has different rules around who can commit someone to a mental hospital when it’s necessary. There are no national laws that cover committing someone to a psych ward. The mental health system is too controversial for politicians to take on. Fixing the broken mental health system would entail taking away some civil rights of people with mental issues, including their second amendment rights. Politicians will not touch this issue; therefore, the mental health system will probably stay broken.   

As time passes we find out more about the shooter, it was known he had issues and refused to get help. It is also important to know that the shooters track coach at his high school told school administrators that the shooter had assaulted her while the shooter was in high school and before he went into the Marines. The track coach was told to let it go because the shooter was going into the Marines and they would straighten him out. It is now obvious the Marines did not straighten him out.  In the end, the shooter had anger issues before he went into the Marines.

I have seen firsthand how difficult it is to get someone with a mental issue help if they refuse it. I have also been told by several parents, family members, and friends of suicidal and PTSD victims that they tried to get their loved ones help, and the mental health system got in their way for whatever reason. OUR MENTAL HEALTH SYSTEM IS BROKEN!  This shooting appears to not have anything to do with weapons, gun laws, or the political climate. It was caused by a failed mental health system.

Our society looks down on those who suffer from a mental issue. The stigma associated with mental health is especially relevant in the veteran community. Veterans often fail to get help for their mental health because of the stigma. Veterans are taught violence; which can be a problem for someone like the shooter who had anger issues before he joined the military. My guess is there was someone who knew this shooting was possible and might have tried to help, but the STIGMA and the system got in the way. I understand it’s hard to take the rights away from someone who fought for your rights but sometimes it is necessary. This appears to be one of those times. Our thoughts are with those families who lost a loved one, even the shooter, he was let down by the system too. The only ones who can truly fix the problem are our politicians. Please press all politicians to do something about our broken mental health system.

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

Marines & Families of Marines Take Note

October is Cancer Awareness month, so I thought discussing an issue that not all Marines and their families know about was warranted. Contaminated water at Camp Lejeune North Carolina has been linked to multiple medical conditions including various kinds of cancer. I was talking to Josh about some of his health issues he had been fighting for years. I did not put Josh’s time in the Marines and his illness together until I ran across the contaminated water issue at Lejeune while doing research for another project I was working on. It appears Marines and their families stationed at Camp Lejeune during a 34-year period had been exposed to contaminated water. I found out that Josh was stationed at Lejeune for his entire 4 years in the Corps. I talked to him about what I had discovered and that this could be a part of his medical issues and that he should check it out.  

The years Marines and their family were exposed to the contaminated water at Camp Lejeune are from 1953 to 1987. As in the past with issues, it took 30 years for the Department of the Navy, Marines, and the VA to admit there was a major health problem concerning Marines and their families assigned to Lejeune. On January 13, 2017, congress gave the VA permission to issue a new rule creating a presumption that certain diseases are eligible for disability benefits. These benefit’s involves Active Duty, Reserve, and National Guard members who served at Camp Lejeune for a minimum of 30 days (cumulative) between August 1, 1953 and December 31, 1987 and their families. For Vietnam and Gulf War veterans, we know what its like to have a presumptive issue. It’s no fun fighting the VA so be prepared to deal with a long, drawn out bureaucracy.    

As we all know, families are not allowed to seek medical care at the VA. Families that served with their Marine at Camp Lejeune during the designated times need to be aware of the presumptive heath issues. By law, the VA can only compensate for eligible out-of-pocket expenses. After a family member has been diagnosed with a presumptive illness, other health plans have paid their part, the VA will pick up the out of pocket costs. It is important that the family members primary care physician know about Camp Lejeune and the possible illness linked to the time spent there. This includes the children who lived on the base during the timeframe. This rule is not the VA’s fault, its congress’. By law, only congress can approve the VA to see dependents even if the military is the cause of the illness.

Remember managing your expectations is imperative when dealing with the VA. It is not fair that the military placed you in the position you are in, but it is not the person’s fault who’s working with you either.  When dealing with a bureaucracy like the VA, you can easily get frustrated and give up. Even if you do not trust the VA or like them, it is imperative you get on the Camp Lejeune contaminated water registry, if not for your health but for your family’s health. If you or your family were stationed at Camp Lejeune anytime from 1953 to 1987, please act. The instructions tell you to enroll on-line, I would go to the VA in person and get on the registry to ensure you get documentation.      

VETERANS ENROLL IN VA HEALTH CARE

• Go to the VA. Have your DD-214. If you have documentation of your service at Lejeune take it also.

• Inform VA that you served on active duty at Camp Lejeune for at least 30 days anytime in the period of August 1, 1953 and December 31, 1987. If you are already enrolled contact your local VA health care facility at their website http://www.va.gov/ directory/guide/ to sign up for the Camp Lejeune Program and receive VA care.

• Not yet enrolled? Apply online at https://www.va.gov/health-care/apply/application/introduction or call toll-free at 1-877-222-8387.

FAMILY MEMBERS GATHER DOCUMENTS

• Show your relationship to a Veteran, such as a marriage license or birth certificate.

• The VA will assist you with verifying residency on Camp Lejeune during the covered timeframe. GATHER QUALIFYING EXPENSE RECEIPTS

• APPLY FOR REIMBURSEMENT

• Apply online at https://www.clfamilymembers.fsc.va.gov or call toll-free 1- 866-372-1144.

QUALIFYING HEALTH CONDITIONS INCLUDE:

• Bladder cancer

• Lung cancer                

• Hepatic steatosis                      

• Breast cancer               

• Multiple myeloma                   

• Miscarriage

• Esophageal cancer                   

• Myelodysplastic syndromes

• Neurobehavioral effects           

• Kidney cancer

• Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma      

• Renal toxicity

• Leukemia                                

• Female infertility

• Scleroderma

For questions or comments, we can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.

The Cost of Doing the Right Thing

Francisco is a Marine veteran client that I work with. He had two tours in Iraq and struggles to deal with what happened. Francisco was in-voluntary extended after his 4 years in the corps because he was supposed to be a part of the “surge”. His last tour he had a fellow marine from his unit die in his arms on his first tour and now he had to go on another one. Francisco lives with the feeling that his fellow Marine took his last breath while he was holding him. Francisco continues to feel that last breath leaves the Marine before he died. That incident effects his decisions to this day. One of the reasons he made the decision to do what he thought was right the rest of his time in the Marines, and that decision cost him.

What he was concerned about the most is his inability to not make lance corporal. He separated from the Marines as a corporal. This is very demeaning to him, especially the reason why he did not make rank. You see, Francisco made the mistake of standing up for an inferior marine why he was beaten by his Sargent. His Sargent was beating a fellow Marine in the next rack while he was trying to sleep. Francisco continually tried to stop the Sargent from beating the Marine. He was told to stay out of it. After the sergeant was done beating the Marine he proceeded to treat the marine by doing CPR. The Marine was beaten so bad he had stopped breathing. He then filed a complaint and the sergeant was reprimanded. After that incident Francisco was always having to look over his back. He was ostracized as being a trouble maker and a rat. He was treated with little respect by his peers in the corps. After he had decided to leave the Marine Corps he was offered a promotion, which he refused. After being treated the way he was for saving his fellow Marine he decided he would get out. He feels he is being looked down upon by fellow veteran Marines for doing the right thing.

Francisco continues to struggle by questioning his choice to do what he felt was right. He has seen many that have done questionable things and have gotten away with them, and even becoming better off than they were. He feels doing what was right has cost him many times in his life and he consistently asks me why he should keep doing what was right because it has not helped him, it has only hurt him. It is a difficult task to convince someone that doing the right thing is what is best even if it cost them. He tried to do what the Marines told him to do, he followed the written code to the letter, and the problem was he did not follow the unwritten code of not telling on others when he sees hazing of another Marine.

Another issue that Francisco deals with is what other Marines say about him behind his back. He has told several people this story since he got out and they have looked down upon him as if he was still in. What Francisco needs to learn is he owns his story that he does not have to tell everyone about his situation. Francisco is an honest person who feels bad about holding back anything from his time in the Marines. He has lived his life being the honest person, he feels like it has backfired. Unfortunately, his case is not the only one I've heard. It is difficult to make these decisions and he made it. Francisco did the right thing but paid the price of doing it.

From a clinical standpoint it is difficult for young man to deal with this type of burden. In his mind the choice he made will affect him for the rest of his life. Many men and women in the military are brave enough to stand up for what they feel is right. There are those that stand up for what they believe is right knowing there will be consequences to their actions. Some accept that responsibility and move forward. Others struggle with their decision and consistently wonder if they made the right one. Many things the Marine struggles with when he gets out in society often does not do the right thing. Even though all military branches are taught integrity loyalty commitment not all people follow that code. Doing what's right can often lead to struggles. Many civilians do not make ethical decisions and that bothers those who do. Those who do the right thing start to question whether they're doing the right thing by sticking to their morals. This type of stuff happens and some pay the consequences. My opinion is we should all stand up for what is right even though it costs us. If everyone used this code the military, civilians, and society would all be a better place.

For questions or comments, I can be reached at afterdutyvets@gmail.com or visit our website at marriedtoptsdpro.com and like us on Facebook at Married to PTSD Pro.